How much do you want me to lie to you?

The title above is a question I would ask coworkers, acquaintances, etc.. whenever they wanted my opinion about something. I need this question for the sake of tact because if not you will hear the non sugar coated version that usually results in me saying or doing something stupid. I guess this bugs me because one of these days I would love to voice my opinion without people having a cow.

I know this day is not coming anytime soon as very few people can get away with saying what everybody thinks and doesn’t say or what they think without offending some part of the population. I don’t think have the agency or position to say any of these things and get away with it. The problem is that I will ethically be inclined to believe that honesty is the best policy.

However, even with these beliefs I myself have been guilty of lying by omission to some of the people I am closest with and some that I am still trying to get to know. The only lame excuse I give is thaf what I could tell them they might not take very well at all. Also, I would like to resolve the issue myself so the point becomes moot and their is nothing to tell. I do plan on telling my psychologist but that is only because of doctor, patient confidentiality.

I am curious as to the readers and bloggers out there do you ever feel like you need to lie to people (be it by omission of info or a white lie) because you think they can’t handle the truth? Also after you have told this lie, do you have guilt for months because you lied… Any two cents on this ethical quandary are much appreciated..

Xoxo, the multifaceted nerd

The image on social media versus reality

I have been wondering if some of the social media influencers are putting on an act. They have these images carefully curated so that their viewers will keep on watching them via tik tok or instagram. Now their are those exceptions with those people who keep it real and you can tell they are being authentic and having nothing to hide.

I think people can sense how authentic the person on social media or as a friend or acquaintance. People have “tells” where they can be saying one thing but nonverbally they mean the opposite. You can tell when they are lying to themselves and others. I can vouch for this as I have been known to lie to myself from time to time.

The problem is sometimes you can’t point out these “tells” to the people you either watch or talk to on a weekly basis. Or when you do all you will get is a angry or emotional response, no matter how warranted. The issue though is sometimes you can see that they might be saying everything’s good when it’s really not. This can be seen based on the tone, a sigh, or in some cases just sounding tired.

One example would be if someone asks what’s wrong and they reply “nothing” depending on the tone and nonverbal cues that nothing might actually be something. I have been guilty of doing this way more than I should. This does have me wondering how many encounters people have had when they can tell someone is lying or they are lying to themselves, they just don’t realize it yet. Additionally, how might people respond to these events in which they are lying to themselves or others. Anyone who has experience the situations listed above, I am curious to know your response to others “masking” their true feelings and emotions, or what do you do when your the one putting a show and trying to hide how you really from others?

Xoxo, the multifaceted nerd