I say this because one of the friends I had talked for years about becoming a film maker of many genres but did he ever pursue it or do anything about it in a small or big way, he talked about it with people, came up with many a pipe dreams, but again nothing happened. He has been know been working at a what would well paid job while he is now going back for a masters degree in some subject. I wish I knew but I don’t think he has decided on one.
Now I have another friend he for a decade wanted to be a singer and while he did pursue it nothing ever came of it in a big way, and while I think this person is a great person, I agree with other people to say that I think he would make a better fit as a fashion designer, song writer, etc, actually this person could probably be like Oprah and Martha Stewart and create their own lifestyle brand with all their ideas and skill sets if given the time and money.
Alright, after analyzing everyone’s career choices lets go to me, because I am not free of scrutiny, I have been saying that I want to be a teacher since I was 19, and now well older than 19 and while I have some tutoring experience and volunteer experience, and have talked in conferences and while I love to research and write I still have not gotten myself to submit a community college job application or talked with my mentor who I have not seen in months. I think I like my fellow friends that if I follow my dream to teach that I will fail and fall really flat on my face , with many a superiors wondering why I have signed myself for this masochistic torture of teaching others. However, in past jobs when someone has learned something or gained a skill, it excites me in knowing that I taught them that. Also even through I have been avoiding the application I still love reading the research that is out there and trying to keep up to date in the academic world in whatever way possible.
Alright, so after all these life choices, readers I guess are wondering what is wrong with these people, why can’t they pursue these dreams that they set out to reach years ago before reality and the job market decided to come in and kick their ass? Alright, now I have a theory about this myself and that can be started with the quote “We set out to be wrecked”. This a quote that I borrowed from a very rare JM Barrie book and I am now applying to this situation.
This quote had me thinking that maybe the reason that my friends and I can’t get our acts together is because deep down we don’t want to or are too scared about what would happen if we even tried to do want we want for our lives, because if we did we would have to stop wandering so helplessly trying to figure out the purposes of our own lives. However, I could be wrong and it might not be just fear holding all of us back, what do you think readers?